Discovering ADHD as a Black Woman: How It Improved My Life, Love, Work, and Family

March 27, 2023 by Ikeranda Smith in black female doctors, black professionals, life coaching, mental health, personal development, self-improvement, transformation

Discover how finding out that I have ADHD later in life has been a game-changer in how I love, work, and care for my family. By learning more about my condition and developing new strategies for managing it, I've become a more effective and present parent and spouse. I've also gained a greater appreciation for the unique strengths and challenges that come with having ADHD and have found ways to leverage my creativity, energy, and spontaneity to benefit my family and my work. Join me as I share my story and offer insights into how others with ADHD can thrive personally and professionally.

Healing as a Black Woman with My Wife and Kids: How It Transformed Our Relationships

March 20, 2023 by Ikeranda Smith in black, black blended families, black professionals, generational healing, LGBTQIA, motherhood, personal growth, self-improvement

As a black woman, healing with my wife and kids has been a transformative experience that has strengthened our relationships with each other positively. By working on ourselves individually and as a family unit, we've learned how to communicate better, empathize with each other's struggles, and offer support when needed most. We've also discovered new ways to have fun and create meaningful memories together, bringing us closer. Healing is a journey, but it has allowed us to become a stronger, more connected family.

Doing the work

June 02, 2021 by Ikeranda Smith in black, Inner child healing, LGBTQIA, loveislove, personal growth

As I sit here wrapped in my thoughts, I am acutely aware of my body. All too often, we have left our bodies before we were ever given the chance to become acquainted with it. We are mere expressions of abuse, neglect + abandonment frequently being reminded of our past as we casually move throughout the world. Most of us were taught to suppress enormous amounts of information in exchange for love or care. Our trauma has played out in the desires we have that are fundamentally disproportionate to the comfort we require daily. The critical issue with quelling our triggers is often we cannot. We must become familiar with the vibrations that remind us that we have never fully recovered.

Taboo No More

September 14, 2020 by Ikeranda Smith in black, children, history, LGBTQIA, life, love, mental health, personal growth, relationships, spirituality

I used to carry the weight of not knowing about the things that plagued my parents. I watched my mother crawl into bed everyday + wrap the burden of a disease un-diagnosed around her for security. We often choose religion instead of science to keep the lie our families tell us. We suffer in silence afraid to live a better quality of life. We suffer in quietness scared to let down the very people that often put us in these positions. I want to be the story that everyone desires to read because I found freedom is releasing myself from the shame of suffering.

US: RACE

May 13, 2019 by Ikeranda Smith in black, Hate Crimes, history, life, love, people of color, white fragility

I have been sitting quietly, meditating on what exactly to say after I watched the movie US. It was so much to say + yet I wondered where to start. So I chose the obvious. Race. As I look at the faces of black folks, I mourn us for so many reasons. We are years away from our souls + haven’t quite fully recovered nor do I think we ever will. Not in this lifetime anyway. It will take several decades to recover the souls that were snatched from our own land + even more decades to remember who we used to be. The reality is race is something we never knew until it was pointed out to us. It was the damaging effects of how racial preferences have a long institutionalized history that often kept black people from opportunities at the expense of our counterparts. It was African slaves replacing the European indentured servants as a source of free labor. It was the General Sherman’s never making good on his “40 acres and a mule” as reparations. It was Jim Crow laws being instituted in the late 19th Century + not being overturned until the 1960’s which reserved the best, jobs, schools, neighborhoods + hospitals for our counterparts. It was the 1935 Wagner Act which granted collective power + excluded black people from access to better jobs, union protection, healthcare, job security + pensions. It was the the Federal Housing Administration deal known today as “redlining” that was explicitly typing mortgage eligibility to race. It was + continually is the border of justice that has always been clearly defined.

When Winter Comes In Spring

May 10, 2019 by Ikeranda Smith in love, life, loveislove, mental health, people of color, personal growth, relationships, women of color

There is a saintly aura that transcends my life every time seasons change. I can feel it in my bones, my back aches + my mind tries to coerce my spirit into thinking this feeling will pass, but the flesh won’t allow it to subside. It is no surprise that I am deeply introspective + probably more honest than others care for me to be. Blame it on my tragic beginning, all the hearts I broke, the lies I told + the trauma I ingested. I gather my mistakes + rinse them daily because unlike most people I see myself clearly because I like my coffee dark with lots of self- reflection. I sit in every choice + every regret until I can cover every circumstance in forgiveness. Lately I’ve experienced all kind of loss which reminds me that I’m still learning how to let grief take a seat until its ready to vacate my sanctuary.

US: Mental Illness

May 09, 2019 by Ikeranda Smith in black, education, LGBTQIA, life, people of color, women of color, mental health

No one escapes the perils of life that pierce us to the point of anguish. Unfortunately for black people, we know this sentiment all too well + are reminded daily as we maneuver our blackness while carrying the weight of our history. It’s complicated! We carry success like a tamed beast; proud but ferocious. We are loving at first glance, appearing to have it altogether but underneath we are tortured by our past. Carrying the weight of having to make it + then free everyone else. Despite our list of accomplishments, black people share a sobering emotional attachment to overcoming mental illness. Often labeled as “crazy” by our own when we vocalize that we couldn’t “pray it away”, therefore resigning to suffer silently rather than reach out for help.

And We Mourn Some More

April 05, 2019 by Ikeranda Smith in black, history, life, love, motherhood, parenting, people of color, personal growth, purpose, relationships, spirituality, women of color

Lately, I have been mourning the parts of me that carry the pain of holding onto my will for so long. I ache at the thought of surrendering + I cringe at the work that is going into relinquishing years of trauma. My muscles are bruised from the plight of being a single mother. There are parts of me that collapse under years of silence; having to stuff down fragmented sentences hoping that later they would make sense. Make no mistake, the heart listens to the suppressed emotions that eventually manifests in our bodies + the deeper burden is to be aware of it all. With every bit of knowledge and acknowledgment there comes an inevitable lingering despair which beckons us to forgive.