Leading With Love and Compassion
This blog is for the individual that desires more of themselves + the people in their lives.
Love, for me, has always been deeply intertwined with the concept of safety. Many people don’t realize that the discomfort they often feel is rooted more in a lack of safety than in the actual events occurring around them. Before I could seek safety from others, I had to learn to cultivate it within myself.
Read MoreLately, I haven't felt like myself. A recent conversation with my astrologer changed that. She lovingly asked me, "Do you feel like you show up as yourself?" I had to admit that while I might feel authentic on date nights, most of the time—whether I'm seeing clients or just going about my day—I feel like I'm wearing a uniform.
Read MoreAs a Black woman, the complexities of our experiences are both profound and deeply nuanced. We are often the pillars of our families and communities, socialized and indoctrinated to be caregivers, nurturers, and the steadfast shoulders upon which others lean
Read MoreNavigating marriage, pursuing my passion, and aiding others in their journeys has been a profound commitment. My wife and I embarked on this path without the guidance of role models, dedicating ourselves wholeheartedly to personal growth.
Read MoreAs I reflect on my journey as a Black queer woman, obedience emerges as a guiding principle, a profound invitation to align with the Divine. It's not merely about following rules but about surrendering to a higher purpose, mainly when life's challenges test our faith. Join me as we explore the transformative power of obedience, discovering how it leads us to our most authentic selves and ignites our souls' profound passions.
Read MoreJoin me on this odyssey as I navigate the complexities, disrupt stereotypes, and strive to be a beacon of encouragement for those who, like me, discovered the power of education against all odds.
Read MoreEmbark on a transformative journey with me as I navigate the intricate landscape of motherhood while breaking free from generational patterns. Despite being a seasoned life coach, life's relentless tests persist, prompting me to practice what I preach. Join me in striving for excellence in parenting, empowering my daughter “CanadaTheGreat”.
Read MoreDiscover how finding out that I have ADHD later in life has been a game-changer in how I love, work, and care for my family. By learning more about my condition and developing new strategies for managing it, I've become a more effective and present parent and spouse. I've also gained a greater appreciation for the unique strengths and challenges that come with having ADHD and have found ways to leverage my creativity, energy, and spontaneity to benefit my family and my work. Join me as I share my story and offer insights into how others with ADHD can thrive personally and professionally.
Read More"Are you tired of feeling stuck and unfulfilled in your life? Life coaching can help you unlock your full potential and achieve your goals, but it's not just a last resort. Life coaching is a proactive personal growth and development approach that can transform your life. With the guidance of a professional life coach, you can identify your strengths, overcome obstacles, and create lasting positive change.
Read MoreI have come to realize that the cost of living authentically is expensive because it requires me to take ownership of spaces that typically didn’t welcome my ancestors. It’s requires a responsibility that unravels in every action, word + deed. It requires discipline to stay before the Creator not to confess my limitations but rather to express my upmost gratitude. It also requires a burden that most people don’t desire to carry due to the obligation to ignite others to pick up their mantle + race to accomplish their purpose.
Read MoreLately I have been leaning into life in such a way that has been keeping me prostrate with my heart open. I cannot recall seeing gentle women in my life because they often carried the weight of unrequited love; heavy with deceitful longings. Frustrated at the thought of giving themselves over to another person or having to carry the burden of raising children alone. I have become the remnants of delicate flesh yearning to heal from centuries of not acknowledging the pain.
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There are moments in life that seemed very different when I was younger + this is one of them. I imagined 40 to look ancient as I decide whether to wash another load of clothes or fix lunches with inconsequential utensils. I pictured myself being in a rat race most days virtually unrecognizable to myself. I visualized myself in a rut, nestled in marriage trying to dodge the 7-year itch + hanging with people who have amputated parts of themselves just to fit in. I envisioned dragging my children to activities as I listen to random people discuss parts of their life they hate. Then I hit 40 + I realized that this moment is more than I ever dreamed. In fact, at 40 I became more of a woman by allowing my scars to be the fuel to navigate my purpose. Actually, at 40 I fell more in love with myself by loving another human being from a perpetual space of forgiveness. If truth be told, at 40 I acknowledged that I hate cooking, I need intimacy at the same frequency as sex or nothing less + I am so grateful to love what I do every day. As a matter of fact, at 40 I recognized that I enjoy people who reflect goodness a hell of lot more than people who deplete my energy. Honestly, at 40 I liberated my children in a way that set us both free + gave me permission to be a woman. The truth is, at 40 I fell in love with me + the beautiful messy journey that got me to this point. Actually, at 40 I am resolved.
Read MoreTo understand gender one must consider the position of black women. The mere fact that we are the most under represented + under paid; yet the most educated informs us that the roots of sexism are founded in the same economic + political institutions that serve the foundation of racism. Daily we crawl from under the heartbreaking backdrops as we illuminate this earth shattering persona just to gain respect. Often assumed to be a single mother despite being betrothed while her relationship suffers as she over extends her participation to compete with women who have the luxury of not being in the labor force. It’s complicated! Overwhelmed with the realization of having to choose between being a mother or a wife in order to survive undermines the well-being of black families. Historically devaluing black women reinforces autonomous women while simultaneously promoting broken homes.
Read MoreWhile watching the movie US, it was the typical backdrop for a traditional black family forced to keep up with their wealthy counterparts as they venture down the rabbit hole. Progress is foreign to black people largely due to the story of race. Most black people consider themselves middle-class; yet only 42% of us own homes. While most of us are doing substantially better than our parents + grandparents; we carry the generational lack that keeps us enslaved. While racism was central to our story, today the picture is extremely more complicated. Although we have an annual spending power of 1.2 trillion, our households have only held a median of $11,000 of wealth. Leaving us only two options: buy up the block or be a business on the block.
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I not quite sure if I acknowledge you enough, though you are stapled to the top of my mouth, etched in my heart + forever on my mind. I am not even sure if I release the right amount of petitions, or shine bright enough for others to see where my light truly illuminates from. I don’t even think that my knees bend as many times as they should to allow my ego a break from drowning your voice. I often feel the weight of the questions that linger way after you remind me of your consistent faithfulness. Yet, I climb out of bed every morning with just enough of you to face my day, a mere fraction of you to share with others as a gentle reminder of your amazing love.
Read MoreThere is a heartbreaking tenderness about black folks. A majestic story that is spoken through stolen slaves + subjugated bodies. Our faces are centuries away from our soul; yet we carry the smile of humanness. An accessibility we would allow if we knew how to enter our own spirits. It’s evident that our feet carry the shackles of insecurities proven to shatter relationships when we come up against our own likeness. We struggle to love due to the threats that were made to keep us isolated. Oh, how I love being black. Did you think I wouldn’t after I divulged some of our frailties? Despite our struggles, we are larger than life, precious jewels that create art through our pain while we use laughter as a salve to heal so that we may survive yet another day.
Read MoreEvery year I enter into a space of deep reflection, not because of overzealous expectations or unrequited interactions. Nor do I feel the need to astound others by overcompensating for the work that is still in progress. Yet and still, I cross the threshold of another year with the weight of things I have incessantly ingested due to realizing I have reached an all new capacity of desiring more. Not more things to perturb me or lofty things that only make others feel that I have arrived. Not even more ostentatious relationships that drain me from the moment salutations are exchanged. Some things take up residence in our bodies + redirect our intentions for no other reason than to waste our time + delay our purpose.
Read MoreLife is mysterious + magical in the most ironic way. It can be filled with deep sadness; yet infused with the most exuberant moments. My existence was tested this year when I was met with the challenge of being married + navigating a long distance relationship while my wife wrapped up her old life to build a new one with me. My entire creation was questioned when I made the decision to remove my mother from my life while being an only child with an estranged father. Meanwhile, the ancestors were working on my behalf as I was navigating the laborious process of purchasing my first home. Not to mention, I was on the cusp of turning 40 + not a minute too soon. Evolution was demanding a more resolved woman that didn’t consume the room upon entrance with heavily weighted credentials but a voice doused in quiet strength determined to chart her own path.
Read MoreIt takes two mature adults to dismantle a union + walk away with everyone minimally unscathed. It takes two caring adults that despite all unfortunate circumstances to make a concerted effort to raise emotionally healthy, secure children. Even more, it takes two adults dedicated to ensuring that the common goal is always about the children. I am convinced that my need to get along with my ex for the sake of my children has always been my ultimate priority. I am even more convinced that children suffer not because of messy separations but due to immature adults that refuse to remain focused on the best interest of the children.
Read MoreWhen I walk into a room oftentimes I am cloaked in numerous statistics, concealed by my accolades, + accosted by an overzealous presumptuous person who often feels like I don’t belong. Sometimes I am even exhausted from the door by the frequent questions that only demand the need for my respect or the lack thereof. Moreover, I am never surprised when I have to overlook someone for thinking that their effort with cross-cultural dialogue has now yielded recognition for something they are still unpacking. It’s a thing!
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